Microfiction: Playground
Playground (Source: Flickr)
Playground
“No, it’s my turn!”
“No, it is not dummy”
The kids at the park were shouting, wanting to play on the swings. It was a hot day: the sun was bright and the clouds were nowhere to be found.
“Don’t move or else you’ll have sunscreen in your eyes!” I applied evenly the cream on his tiny face. “Now, you can play with your sister.” Now let’s observe them since I forgot my book. I hope I have enough water because they will be thirsty. Let’s just hope they won’t make a fuss when it will be time to leave
Time to leave
Yup. They did make a fuss.
Author's note:
I was a babysitter and since I was watching a Pixar movie, I decided to write about the time I was at the park/playground with the kids. This event did happen in real life.
Hi Melanie! I liked this story a lot, especially since I have been in this same situation a lot. They always never want to leave, but then fall asleep as soon as you get them into the car, it is one of the most frustrating but also adorable things ever. Babysitting is so much fun. Good job writing this story and have a good rest of your semester!
ReplyDeleteHi Melanie, I too was a babysitter and have definitely had a moment or two like this before. You did well at conveying the thoughts of a babysitter and made it to the point as well. I really enjoyed the simplicity of this story and it brought me back to a simpler time before Covid-19 and college when I would just run around with the kids all day long. I would just recommend reading back through your story at the end because I did notice a typo. I believe you meant "thirsty", but instead wrote "thirty". Overall though very nice story!
ReplyDeleteHi Melanie! Awesome short story! You were able to display so much of reality into so little words! It has been a while since I was babysitter but this is pretty spot on. The crazy thing is I also remember being the child who never wanted to leave when it was time to go even though deep down I was tired, hungry, and cranky!
ReplyDeleteHello Melanie, what a nice short story! It takes a lot of creativity to convey a complete setting, cast of characters, and an overall mood in a few simple sentences. The short length of a micro fiction work also means that each sentence must push towards the goal of the story, there's no room for filler or excessive description. You effortlessly managed to capture the feeling of a hot summer day and the simple joys of childhood in your writing, great job!
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